For the handful of you reading these pointless blog posts, today was my last official day hanging out with the fuzzies. Seems fitting that I would be attempting to write this final post while the cat is doing her very best to make it difficult for me by sitting on my laptop. To be honest, we're cuddling because the cats were being assholes by way of taking turns sleeping on Georgie's dog bed. After a long hard day of playing at doggy daycare, poor George just wants to sleep. She's been following me around with sad eyes until I finally gave in, picked Minnie up off of the dog bed, and made her cuddle me instead, leaving Georgie free to hit the hay. Le doggo is now soundly snoring away, which means I can treat myself to an end-of-week glass of wine without worrying about having to google search "how to get red wine out of hardwood floor due to an unfortunate tail wagging incident".
I'm going to miss these furry dorks, but I am definitely looking forward to sleeping past 6 am again. First wake up call happened at 3:40 am this morning. No, thank you. Nuh uh. Unacceptable. Georgie thought she could make up for the rude awakening by bringing me a dryer ball. She was mistaken. Don't get me wrong, it was definitely a cute gesture, but cute gestures will never make up for my lost REM cycles.
I wish I had some profound lessons learned from this week that I could share with you all. Instead, I've managed to put together the following list:
1) Make sure your socks don't have holes in them, or at least make sure they are already blood-coloured if you are breaking in a new pair of boots.
2) Always carry dog treats in your pocket.
3) Take said dog treats out of your pocket before you do laundry.
4) If you lose a laundry ball, it's probably because Georgie ate it.
5) It's futile trying to keep Georgie from eating inedible things, but you should still give it your best shot.
6) Cats are assholes.
7) Cats don't like being called assholes.
8) Cats hold grudges for a really long time...
9) If you like sleeping in, be nice to your cats.
10) The easiest way to boost your number of instagram "likes" is by taking many photos of adorable animals. Everyone loves adorable animals.
11) Blogging about cute animals is less exciting, but works pretty well as a good time killer.
12) Nobody reads anymore.
13) I should investigate possible new hobbies.
14) Wine.
Alright, peeps. The wine is fo shiz kicking in and I have laundry to finish before I pull a Georgie and head off to snore town. Goodbye for now, and remember, pets are cuter than babies but they will let you sleep about the same amount (i.e., not at all).
BYEEEEEEEEEE.
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